Feed on

The other day, a new friend commented that there will come to a point in time where we will have to stop relying on this common teacher we have and learn to control our own minds, to experience what we want to experience – to be the rightful Master of it, instead of the other way round. Yet, what seems to be somewhat tricky here is that the mind is so good (albeit just a tool) that at any one point in time we are not aware we are taken over by it as if back into its grip, until the next moment of awareness or an inception of wisdom comes to visit.

Another of my beloved friend was saying that there is no point suppressing the mind, as that only propels further a variety of storylines, which are all effects of many causes. Yet to get back to that one cause, after the multiple layers of ‘mini’ causes will take much effort and time and at times, can be quite tedious unless the thirst and willingness for truth and honesty is so strong. Without either quality, the tendency to fall back into the storylines making them even more real than what was, a moment ago only a thought becomes a whole drama series of I, you, him or her. Can you see how an impersonal thought, when we buy into it becomes our whole experience of existence? It is in fact, amazing.

And the best part is, it is not even me, or you, or him or her. It is all done by it – the mind, and yet we are totally oblivious to it. So easily we fall back into sleep and identify with it with an “I”, “I”, “I”. Not that there is no “I”, but it is just misunderstood.

The mind is merely a tool and yet we allow it rise above us, telling us what to feel, what to do, what to say, what to react or response. It is as if we have no control over it, when in truth we are its Master. The best part of the whole thing is that we are totally oblivious to it and hence allow it to run wild; much like a dog pulling its owner on a lease, rather than the other way round.

Might as well just allow, which is true and let it dance to its end. When right understanding has not surfaced, it is not possible to do anything as any mode of doing is just another trick, another form of suppression, another form of layer onto the already suffering mind.

Yet, when we are able to see the meaninglessness of what the mind is conjuring will then be a possibility to overrun it. And this requires much honesty too. If we are seeing the meaninglessness of it all from wanting to get out of the ruckus, what is the difference of suppressing the mind? At the end of the day, what is our attitude and intention towards the already arising emotions? When we know that we are inclined towards a certain kind of emotion or storyline, what is it in for me? There is really no right or wrong here, but why again and again, we fall back into the same trap, being enticed over and over again into the drama of life?

What is life then without the drama, some may ask? So if you like drama, that is fine too – then why blame, why judge, why suffer? Oh, you like to blame, judge and suffer? Then there must be joy derived from all these activities, no?

I cannot escape from the duality of this world. While it is true, in sadness, I’d taste happiness; in poorness, I’d appreciate abundance and so on so forth; but who is to tell me which is what and what is which and what is true and which is false? No one, for I am the sole judge of the whole darn experience. I like this, I reject another; I like the other, I reject this. There is no end to it. It is always, always a push or pull factor with my hand firmly gripping, whether I am pushing, or I am pulling. Either way, I have not let go of anything eventhough I’d like to think that I did. Then what the hell am I doing here?

Can I not see that they exist only because of preference, and that preference is too not done by me? It is the contrast that the mind experiences in order to decide on its preference. But why let the mind choose, when I am its Master? Yet at this juncture, my only role is to undo, undo and undo. What am I undoing and why undo and not using the mind as it was very well intended?

Is it because I am so scared of it that I’d better stay clear of it so that I do not suffer? Who is the “I” here that is suffering if I am not the mind? And if I am truly holding an impartial view to the mind’s boogie, why do I resist or hold on? Again, who is the “I” that resist or holds on? Is it really Master or the mind?

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