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Tell Me, Already

You bellow me with sweet words
afraid of my downfalling
into the myriad of emotions
that had me drown in before.

Building my make belief
that protection is what you are giving me
it did look like tender love, you know
in that strong and warm façade.

Yet, has that all changed now?
my trust in you – all these years
believing that we had grown
and possibly moulded into one?

Or had it actually been just a mirage
that only I alone possess?
oh how awful, this passing nightmare
this tormenting confusion!

What do I do now? Where do I go?
oh beloved, would you know how much this means to me!
triggered by unexpected knowledge
uncontrollable outburst and scattered pieces
evident of my illusive control – Loss!

Is it really me that has caused your misery
or is it you who could no longer bear the lie?
can I trust you once more, my darlin’?
only this time, to finally tell me the truth?

Decisively free me from my illusions, please
that you too, had ignorantly put in place
show me where else darkness had been, albeit unknowingly
so that the mist can finally disappear.

So that, I, can finally awake.

*inspired by the witnessing of integrity at work*

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