There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them.
~ Denis Waitley
Tags: acceptance, appreciation, conditionings, Denis Waitley, integrity, reality, takingresponsibility
Two Choices: Accept or Change
Sep 22nd, 2011 by admin
Enlightenment
Sep 15th, 2011 by admin
I don’t really know what enlightenment is, or what it means. Some say that it is the mind being fully illuminated with light, some say that it is right understanding and some say that it is a state of bliss, peace, joy with all wholesome qualities and some even say that it is a state of realisation. If I were to look beyond the words interpreted onto the word ‘enlightenment’, it seems to me that there is a commonness in the meanings presented onto the word ‘enlightenment’ and is an effect, i.e. a result happening as an experience in a moment, or in the neverending moment.
A beloved friend who attended a course shared with me that it was researched that nearly everyone who is on the spiritual journey wants enlightenment. When he said that, I still don’t really know what it is. An honest friend today also told me that she doesn’t know what enlightenment is but yet it is something that is much talked or thrived towards by practitioners in the journey. And lately, I have also come across some comments from some people that they don’t really want enlightenment but just a pain-free life. And tonight, a dear friend also shared he believes it is impossible for him to be enlightenment this lifetime and hence just wants to know how to deal with life, as in reality whenever there are conflicts arising.
I find it funny how everyone was putting the same thing into different words as if all the meanings or words that they seem to present is either enlightenment or not. Ultimately, it seems as if what everyone wants is peace and end of suffering (which is peace, by the way) whether they choose to use the word enlightenment or not. I don’t really know the Buddha personally (obviously!) but I have heard that he mentioned that enlightenment is the end of suffering, too. Now, isn’t end of suffering, peace? I am aware that I am repeating here but it is important to see how pain-free, end of suffering and peace are not really separate. And how do we arrive at peace except through understanding and realisation, and in that state, wouldn’t the mind be already illuminated with light since it was apparent darkness looming around that caused confusion or conflict? It is hilarious to me, and I am not meaning to demean anyone, but merely chuckling at how words and perceptions come into play colouring each and everyone’s lenses to make them see that what they each want is different from what others pursue in the journey or how what others want is something different from theirs?
Ultimately, enlightenment is not somewhere to go, to achieve or to arrive at. It is understanding and realisation of various causes that leads to the various effects that causes the confusion or conflict which has been termed as suffering whether it is a disagreement with another, an illness, not achieving one’s goals in life, career, relationships or even in the spiritual endeavour. Just because I am meditating does not mean that the person who doesn’t and sweeps the floor on the sidewalks of the highway is any less spiritual than me. It is the interpretation that leads to making me separate from the other person who is apparently doing something different from me or seeming treading along a different journey. What is the difference if I am meditating and suffering meditating and he is there peacefully and joyfully sweeping the sidewalks of the highway? At the moment, he is probably the enlightened one (if it means peace at its end), and not me although it seems as if I am the one who is pursuing enlightenment! How arrogant! And that is double dose of suffering onto me! So if I am pursuing enlightenment, I might as well quit meditating and join him in sweeping the highway! Of course, this is just an example of contrast.
If I have to put a meaning to what enlightenment is, I’d say it is a word that embraces the meaning of pain free, end of suffering, understanding, peace, joy, bliss, a state of realisation in totality, without separation. Dissect them and you will find that they are all the same thing, probably at different levels or at different momentums of moments, but really sincerely look deeper and you will see what I mean and ultimately – peace, and also serenity (do you notice that the smile of Buddha’s face is serene, don’t you?)
So to conclude onto the journey of oneself or others is erm, probably far from it since how is it possible any conclusion or judgment can lead to peace as effect? Even if one is journeying through their personal issues such as relationships, career or personal life – if that is their way or path to fully realise, what is wrong with that? And for those who choose to take it on a more general basis of seeing it as all-mind, what is wrong with that too? It is just tackling the journey from a different direction with much creativity and individuality leading towards e-n-l-i-g-h-t-e-n-m-e-n-t.
If I am having a personal issue, and my probing allows me to see the truth or way of the issue, that is enlightenment to me in the moment as that is peace as effect until the next shit hits the fan. But if nothing is arising that triggers me, why would I look for it just to have enlightenment? As the moment that I am seeking it, I am already far, far away from it and many fail to see it. And of course, there is always an ultimate point. But to state that the ultimate point is the ultimate-ultimate, guess what, you are back into the game of again!
Yet, I cannot seek for enlightenment with a goal to have a pain-free, peaceful, blissful life or whatsoever as I can be sure that I can never ‘reach my goal’ with that kind of motivation. Enlightenment itself as mentioned earlier is a natural effect and not something we can thrive towards. Yet each time, whenever faced with a situation and given the diligence to do my inner work with right intention and attitude, as in not to fix it or to get rid of it, I will be blessed with right understanding and realisation which would have already inevitably put me into an enlightenment state since it is after all, just now that we have. And as fleeting as it gets, the journey is full of surprises! By then the meaning of pain-free does not even arise as we don’t really view pain as pain-pain per se, but rather, a naturalness in looking at it differently as effect; so where there lies the meaning of suffering or even wanting a pain-free life?
Yet, is it possible to have a pain-free enlightened life? Why not? But you can’t do it to get yourself out of something although usually that is the very thing that propels you towards it. Do it for the love of truth, because it is the truth that sets you free. And when you are free, what enlightenment are you looking for? And isn’t that, paradoxically, already enlightenment in the now?
I like to joke with my mom about being half-way enlightened and fully enlightened. Again, I don’t really know what it means but for the sake of exchanged expression, probably fully enlightened is a fully realised state where the entire cause and effect are seen as it is in a constant awake state in the neverending now.
But then again, what the hell do I know about enlightenment? I am just another medieval skipping joyfully along my journey still not knowing what enlightenment means. 🙂
Tags: awareness, Buddha, conditionings, ego, Freedom, Home, Ideas, ignorance, innertalks, mindfulness, reality, relationships, Self, selfawareness, spiritualjourney, Truth, wisdom
Apply, Practise & Live It!
Sep 11th, 2011 by admin
What is the point of attending umpteen workshops and not apply it?
What is the point of sharing what you have learned with others and not practise it?
***
Many work through the doors of the centre I work with, and many attend workshops or even seek private sessions of counselling on their endeavours of their journey. Yet strangely, the moment they walk out the door, it is as if everything is forgotten and given back to those who had imparted their sharing. Of course, I am not saying that all are of the same. In fact, there are some who are pretty vigilant in their practice and it is not hard to tell when lots of queries are posted afterwards as if hungry—hungry for more. Yet, is the practise all about just questioning and pondering and listening to others’ talk and occasionally joining in the conversation? Lots of techniques and information has been given, and I have observed that most only ‘apply’ when they are in great distress or pain over a certain issue and such attitude usually has much to do with wanting to ‘get rid of’, ‘get away from’ and ‘fix it’ as motivation. Other than that, for those matters that don’t trigger enough, they let those bypass them as if those matters are too trivial. Of course, I am not saying that we dwell in ‘smaller’ issues, but we seldom see the potential of ‘smaller’ issues as bringing us deeper insights that could very well prepare for us for a potential ‘bigger’ issue. We fail to see that those smaller issues are actually accumulated causes that end up as a ‘big’ overwhelming issue later on as effect when not addressed earlier. Having said that, I am also not saying that we don’t practise discernment in the things we question in the mind although the journey can be very much accelerated if the wheel has started turning. Why stop?
I have come across beginner practitioners who practise often enough that the little, little realisations that they gain from their little, little issues are overwhelmingly mind-blowing to the extent that when they are faced with a bigger issue in life, they find that they were already naturally calmer in addressing the big issue rather than having to try to be calm and start being mindful or to initiate the inquiry process. That to me, is a result of practice leading to natural transformation. It is when you have nothing to fix, the attitude is appropriate for mindfulness and inquiry is wholesome for the practice to be fruitful. The ‘wanting to fix it’ attitude already comes from a mental of wanting something out of it from not wanting the situation instead of genuine inquisitiveness and curiosity; where there lies your wholesome motivation for the practice? Yet paradoxically, isn’t it a daunting issue that propels us on the journey?
I invite those who came on the journey from a past hurt to see the issue as only a catalyst for you to come into your own journey of understanding yourself fully and not only for this one incident. There are many areas in life which could potentially lead you to inner peace and inner freedom. And I invite those already on the journey to be diligent enough in your practice rather than again and again succumbing to the patterns of self judgement. The final frontier is always, always towards yourself and if you have stopped there, it is as good as not starting the journey in the first place. You have come to equip yourself with skills sufficient to carry out the practice on your own; also being assured again and again that support is just around the corner though not for you to depend on. Make full use of it. Don’t let anything stop you from your immense potential.
Tags: awareness, Freedom, honesty, innertalks, integrity, mindfulness, Self, selfawareness, spiritualjourney, takingresponsibility, willingness
Get It Right
Sep 9th, 2011 by admin
No, I am not intentionally promoting Glee,
but I trust this song speaks to most of us, if not all.
Enjoy!
~ song performed by Lea Michele playing Rachel Berry in Glee ~
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5Y3uQwhlS8]
Tags: forgiveness, integrity, reflections, Self, selfawareness, surrendering, takingresponsibility, unworthiness, vulnerability
The Journey of Awakening
Sep 8th, 2011 by admin
The journey of awakening is never an easy one. It comes with a lot of pain, massive emotional turmoil which some refer to as the dark night as part of the process.
And I can understand why some people shudder at the journey because it is so daunting. For those who hear of it, they might think that it is madness and for those half way through it, few choose to cross the shore for the storm and the waves of the sea just seems so threatening as if it would swallow them whole. It is after all, a very lonely journey to begin with.
I was blessed this evening to be able to work with a loving soul who authentically cried his heart out. There were feelings of being lost, sad, angry and all of those that you could name under the no-good-feeling category. It takes much courage, bravery, courage and strength to go through such an intense process as if he wasn’t really sure if he was going to survive the turmoil. I am much grateful for his willingness to stay with the entire process and also for inviting me into his inner world.
The thing is, anyone serious about freedom or inner peace (they are not really separate, by the way) would walk this course because they are aware of its end. Although many have said that it is useless to aim or strive for a future but being aware of what is at the end of the yardstick and knowing clearly the goal keeps the seeker motivated enough not to allow ‘obstacles’ to get in his way. This is not very different from the saying, “If you are afraid, do it anyway” and this usually applies as a physical action of achieving something in the world, for example bungee jumping, riding a bike, public speaking, going for an audition or simply being on a path of a dream job; except that the journey of awakening works in the level of the mind instead of in the physical world so to speak.
It is important to be open minded enough to gather Right information as ‘protection’ for the journey. For we have learned too much of the opposite view that it is so ingrained in us that the tendency to fall back into the old patterns and redoing the same old things with the same attitude is highly potential and this cannot be taken lightly. And it takes much diligence and vigilance meaning the Right attitude to tread on this particular journey (or any other journey in particular) what more now we are working with the mind instead of anything physical outside of us.
And of course, support is very important too and I am not speaking of the outer support although it is also essential at the initial stage of the journey and probably somewhere along the middle or even end journey (if there ever is an end!). I am speaking of the inner support and the inner nurturing that we begin to give ourselves.
Awareness is one of the dearest and essential skills one can truly benefit from and embrace for the journey although it is not the ultimate. The journey comes very much with combination of endeavours and varied layers and stages where often, tools are introduced to ‘lightened’ the burden of the seeker. Yet awareness is always the one that grounds the seeker and thus the whole process and when I say skill here it is to refer to moments of remembering and ‘what’ is being watched.
I applaud those with integrity and persistence to journey on and rest assured, while the waves and waves of dark nights are often, very, very bleak, depressing and hollow… the dark night really, is just the dark knight. 🙂
“The night is darkest before the dawn. And I promise you, the dawn is coming.” ~ Harvey Dent, The Dark Knight (Batman), 2008
Tags: awareness, compassion, conditionings, ego, Fear, Freedom, Home, honesty, integrity, mindfulness, reflections, Self, selfawareness, spiritualjourney, surrendering, takingresponsibility, willingness
Freedom ~ As It Is
Sep 7th, 2011 by admin
Freedom is not about being able to do what you want to do, it is realising that you have never been in bondage and are already doing or not doing whatever you are choosing to do or not do; being or not being where you already are right now, without reason.
Of course, if you ever need a reason, then a reason shall and will be given you. Question that, and you are left with nothing – either doing or not doing what you are already doing or not, being or not being where you are; right at this moment; or simply, just moving away; anyway. Question any of that again, and you are left with nothing again, realising once again that all that is happening now is exactly what and how you want it to happen, as reality.
People tell me that it is impossible to get out of a seeming situation and typical examples are to get out of a job, or a relationship, or a home, or a country and etc. Let’s work with the job thing – I want to do what I love but it doesn’t pay so I have to be practical to stay with the job that pays me well. Sounds familiar? If you ask me (which many have), my take is that this person might have mistaken what he or she really wants for now. I’d say that he or she is oblivious to what he or she really wants in this moment, and that is having a job that pays well rather than a job which allows him or her to do what he or she loves. And in a very ironic way, he or she is already doing what she loves, and that is working at a job that pays him or her well. Somehow, it looks like it does boil down to some sort of imbalanced equation in terms of comparison of what do I want more, doesn’t it?
The thing is, when we are clear of what it is we want in this moment of all that is happening, the illusionary suffering or bondage unveils. We are thus set free from suffering – even if it means staying in a job which I apparently don’t enjoy my duties, living or taking care of a spouse who is sickly, handling house chores to the point where the body aches or the skin becomes dry, or even choosing to stay in a marriage for the children when the relationship is no longer serving for the highest good. As long as we are clear, that what it is that we want, and that it is we who want it, we are free. And of course, we can always, always choose again, whenever there is clarity and wisdom.
If the reason to my decision is for another or something outside of me – as in the world, I can be sure that I’d be headed up for suffering again as it is delusional to be doing something for someone else; unless in an awakened state since. I was having a conversation with a new friend who claimed that she and her husband are separated but chose to stay together under the same roof. She shared that she was doing it for the kids and I reminded her that she was doing it for herself. The kids, the money, the job, the spouse, the relationship, the house, the car, time, day, week, year, whatever – they all have nothing to do with our suffering. And it takes much integrity and honesty for one to come face to face with that, or else the illusionary sufferings of ‘have to’s or ‘should’s and ‘should not’s come into play. Citing the reason of something out there being the condition of what I am doing now or where I am now is absolutely bogus, at least to me. I have to be so completely honest that even when I am addressing someone else’s needs as mine, I am doing it for my own sake (thus, what I want) and never ever for the other and this applies as long as I am the one being binded, thus not free.
And I am aware how ‘wanting’ comes as a certain kind of unwholesomeness in that it that causes suffering and I am not saying that it is untrue either. I would say that it is more because of the illusion of not getting what we think we want that causes suffering and that happens when we are unclear that what is happening at this moment is what we had wanted all the time. How awareness and questioning comes in complementary is to unlock what we could not see for ourselves deep in our hearts what we had initially and always wanted. We always, always get what we want. If you think you always get what you don’t want, question that and you will end up realising what you thought you didn’t want was exactly what you had wanted, but blinded to you at a conscious level. And of course, question that and you are left with only one thing which is what you are already doing, being or heading for the moment. And rest assured, it can change anytime.
I could tell you 101 stories but they’d each be too long since as it is, every learning lesson is a journey which can even take lifetimes. And it is in each and every moment when I can answer honestly and truthfully to myself that I’d find my little, little liberation. What I choose to do afterwards is irrelevant, as there has never been a right or wrong action, a right or wrong decision, except moments that comes from peace and wisdom.
That, to me, is ultimate freedom.
Tags: awareness, conditionings, Freedom, honesty, Ideas, innerchild, innertalks, inquiry, integrity, mindfulness, reality, reflections, relationships, Self, selfawareness, spiritualjourney, takingresponsibility, willingness, wisdom